idon'tknow

it was so...new.

the feeling that i was actually at a loss for words was something awfully..new.

it's like you're falling from a high building and you are totally helpless--all you can do is wait for the loud *blag* and the feeling of nothingness that'd succumb you.

i was mad. i still am. so much so that i couldn't form a single coherent description of this emotion.

i was hurt. i never thought that i'd be able to feel this alone with you--or without you. i thought i've learned. those dreadful memories which kept on haunting me every now and then suddenly came full blast on my face. it's like a strong wind blew out of nowhere.

and yes i am sad. disappointed.

for the first time in a long long while, i feel queasy. i can feel the churning of my tummy. i feel the butterflies in my stomach.

i am thrown out and i do not know where to go. or what to do.

i am out of balance. ran out of ideas.

out.